We Need To Talk About G
get ready for some pearl-clutching
Hello divas,
It’s Mo aka DJ Gay Panic, and this(!) is The Deviant Dispatch. I’m posting from my corner of the NYC “underground” to bring you subcultural musings, scene updates, and queer shit. There will be typos.
I never thought I’d be writing an anti-drug essay, but here we are. This definitely isn’t for everyone but I know that many people will be glad I wrote this. Everything here has been weighing on my mind, and I simply have to get it off my chest.
What is G? You sweet summer child I love you for asking. Formally known as GHB, you might know it as the date rape drug. It’s usually a liquid, and when people take it you get a euphoric rush, feel uninhibited, and horny. If that sounds like molly, let me stop you right there. The vibe is way less chatty and way more drunky. It’s a depressant not a stimulant. People normally use eye droppers to add it to drinks, hence its reputation as the date rape drug. Except now people are doing it on purpose.
Ketamine people are often self-conscious about how they might be acting. By comparison, GHB users are shamelessly moving through a crowded dance floor like they’re playing bumper cars. You'll see them at underground raves across New York, camped in the narrow hallway of a diy rave right by the entrance to the dance floor. Or They’re dead center on the dance floor in front of the DJ booth, vials in hand.
The lack of inhibitions means the 5-person crew is ignorant of how in the way the are. They can only sway and look towards the floor. Or they misjudged their dose. You can clock that tea when they start passing out standing up, slumped over at the waist and leaning on their friends (or whoever has the misfortune of standing next to them.)
And sure every G user isn’t completely unaware of their surroundings. Maybe it’s unfair of me to lump all G users into the same annoying category. But they made their choice and now they have a new peer group. You might be born a gay, but you’re not born a G queen.
In the discourse (AKA ravers complaining) it’s popular to characterize all G users as gay gym bunnies. But it’s not just the muscled up white boys saying yes to GHB anymore. Now even the dolls and the sapphic divas1 are getting in on the action.
Has nightlife really gone so far that we’re doing a drug that has to be kept in a specific vial cuz it will melt plastic?
What fun is a party drug that makes it impossible for you to dance in time with the music?
i promise y’all are goofy enough without trying to do a Spongebob / Patrick impression in the club.
Unlike Ketamine, my dislike for G is not just based on the vibe of users (why are you passing out on me while I'm trying to dance?) but from how dangerous the drug is. From the Face magazine “It’s no exaggeration to say that taking a shot of G after a single drink could kill you.” I don’t know if I’ve witnessed a death by GHB, but I have witnessed many people pass out and look like they’re overdosing. The specter of death was obvious even before I looked up the medical implications.
In the Guardian we get this stinker of a quote: “The optimum dose of G someone might want to take is precipitously close to the dose that could kill them. Less than one millilitre could be the difference, which is why G users often measure out a precise dose with an oral syringe and set an alarm on their phone to make sure they don’t re-dose too soon (sometimes called ’the G o’clock alarm2’). On top of that, it’s also noted for being highly physically and psychologically addictive.”
Talk about a chop. The chopshop in fact!
It feels like GHB use is the latest sign of the extreme times we live in. The MAGA movement has their boots on our mental necks. People can’t uncouple from their political worries when they try and have fun. Plus our hyper self-aware front-facing camera culture has everyone on alert. We’re being perceived all the time and act accordingly, a duck frantically paddling under the surface of the water. Act normal act authentic act normal act authentic no not like that woops went too far act normal normal smile smile.
It’s easy to see how a drug that erases inhibitions and provides easy euphoria could feel like a gift, especially a drug without immediate + discernible next-day side effects. Finally a way to silence the demon in your head and have fun! Unfortunately it’s clear that we need a little of that self-reflection in order to properly carry. Don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater.
I want my friends around and working through their anxiety not just ignoring it with the help of GHB. From the Guardian: “Ironically, although in the short-term it makes users feel invincible, in the longer term it leads to an increase in anxiety and depression. ‘GHB takes over your emotional regulation system. So when you come off it, you realize you can’t cope with your emotions properly,’ Harmen Beurmanjer says.3”
God forbid this essay makes someone decide to just be more secretive about G use from me or their friends. People using any drug alone or on the down low is an infinitely more dangerous proposition, and G is top 3 in the party drug pageant.
Take the time to measure your dose! Don’t try and sneak it in behind my back and misjudge the amount!
If you are on G I will help make sure ur phone is charged so you can wait for the timer instead of guesstimating how long it’s been since your last dose. Too many doses and you’re messily passing out or having a seizure.
If someone has taken so much G that they’ve passed out at the afters, I want to be in there making sure they’re breathing regularly. TBH tho, I’m not capable of telling what’s snoring and what’s respiratory failure. Are you?
I also don’t want you to just quit cold turkey, Again from The Face: “Without expert treatment, quitting cold turkey could, in the worst case scenario, lead to life-threatening seizures.”
But more than that, I don’t want you doing G at all. I say this respectfully, as a judy who loves you.
I know that people are using G in the nightclubs, and I go in expecting that. When I pass the group of guys by the door to the dancefloor, I know at this point they’ve already decided to do it. Not pithy comment from me is gonna prevent them. The dose has been administered.
But I am not on the street in front of a nightclub, or casting judgy looks inside. I am sitting at a cafe writing a newsletter. And I’m not afraid to point out that since most clubs, and certainly an illegal warehouse, do not have the well lit area for you to properly measure ur doses that doing GHB there is a reckless idea. A party setting is not the best for having to suddenly do tasks when a timer rings.
Some people are engineering spaces that are more designed for G use. When I was in Germany4 I heard stories of Berlin’s “Chills” aka apartments or Airbnbs where people do G and fuck for hours. I heard tale of a host for one such chill who made a time log in the bathroom for everyone to write down the time of their doses. At one point during the festivities he turned off the music and shouted “I’ve noticed some people have not filled out in the time log!” He then said that if someone falls out, they would be booted from the party no questions asked.
But it’s not as if the G use is even confined to chills or illegal warehouse raves anymore. Gay guys are being spotted dosing in broad daylight in front of Madison Square Garden before the Kesha show. Queer ravers took online in droves to complain after a group of gays were seen dosing G and having sex at Soul Summit, a popular all-ages and historically black house music party in Fort Greene Park.
It’s clear that this is a growing problem. We need to take steps to educate people about the dangers of G + help our friends who are on it to get their shit together and sleep. Or even connect people to NA. What’s more, the rise in GHB usage is one of the many signs that we all need to start caring + supporting each other, lest we watch our friends turn to dangerous chemical crutches to soothe their pains. We need more IRL connection, meaningful activities, and to imagine a new paradigm for our subculture and our community. We, as queer people on the left of the political spectrum, have enough problems without developing another dangerous drug habit en masse.
That’s it for this dispatch. If you liked it please consider forwarding this email post to a pal! If you’re the pal please subscribe. You can send me tips about worthy events, news & gossip, and shit about anything I mentioned by responding to this email. Even just hitting the like button does tons to help this project!
diva is a gender neutral pronoun as far as the deviant dispatch is concerned
editor’s note: I’m pretty sure now they just call it “G o’clock”
“Harmen Beurmanjer is a leading GHB researcher based at Novadic-Kentron, a drug rehabilitation centre in the Netherlands. He’s been studying GHB there, where use is more widespread and well-documented, for more than a decade” - The Guardian
I must say, in general Berlin is very anti-G. While at Whole Festival I certainly saw people behaving like they were on G. But I didn’t see a single person dosing. No vials or eyedroppers in sight!